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As We Grow Up Things Change



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shooting_starAs we grow up things change. Life was so much easier back then when scrapes from the bike ride were the worst pain, the worst fight you had was about who would have remote control. Life was so much easier when goodbyes meant “I’ll see you tomorrow” and when no one was afraid to say “I love you”.

As we grow up things change. Or maybe we do. Fading away, drifting with the flow, losing ourselves. Forgetting childhood dreams and old promises. Getting lost in the whirlpool of fake priorities and artificial emotions. We do things because we are supposed to do them. Because someone said so. Because everyone does this. We forget who we are and what we want. We are too scared to follow our own dreams.

As we grow up things change. Or maybe time does. 24 hours are not enough anymore. We have to run somewhere. To fix this, to clear that, to fight, to argue, to prove ourselves right, to learn new stuff, to earn more money, to work more… to smile less. 1440 minutes of constant struggling. 86400 seconds of permanent stress. Deprived of the privilege to actually enjoy life.

As we grow up things change. We have a luggage of sad memories, broken promises, lost friendships, missed opportunities. We know what it is like to believe, to hope, to dream. But we also know how it feels when every promise, every feeling, every dream would break into pieces. The pieces which even collected and put into the trunk of our experience are not the whole anymore.

As we grow up things change. It is tougher to be happy. We want more from life, we expect more from people. We lose more. We are not the same anymore. It is tougher to believe. Tougher to dream. Tougher to be that kid who wanted to fly high in the sky like an eagle, or a hawk, or just any bird. It is tougher to be.

As we grow up things change. We stop throwing coins into the fountains. We don’t cross fingers anymore or make a wish when we blow out birthday candles. We don’t believe in the shooting stars either. Maybe because we lost hope that our deepest wishes would finally come true.

As we grow up things change. We laugh less. We enjoy less. We forget to call people we care about. We pretend to be too busy. We don’t have time to tell people what they mean to us. We forget what it means to be real. To be human. To be yourself.

As we grow up things change. I wish they didn’t.

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Lena Toporikova
The owner, writer and editor of Colors of My Soul. I love that small island of creativity in the large ocean of Internet. And I truly believe we can touch another soul with rightly chosen words.

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  • http://pink-loves-brown.blogspot.com/ Mehreen

    It’s one of the topics I wanna read more about… childhood, growing up, and things changing. Always had trouble coping with change. I wish things wouldn’t change. But guess what? My childhood is right there, inside me. It’s safe there :) It brings a smile to me every time i recall it.

    Nice write up Lena… you’re doing a good job! :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      that is everything we can ever do, isnt it? to keep the child alive in ourselves. Then no matter how things and people around us change, we will still be able to be proud of ourselves for being the way we always wanted to be :)

  • http://1mind2worlds.blogspot.com Vinay

    hey Lena, this is very good…!
    its something to think about and its very true… time is just not enough these days. u feel the smaller things need to be more detailed and spend more time on that, at the end, u feel time is not enought.

    thats life i guess! its true what u say, we laugh less, enjoy less! don’t know exactly why though, coz only thing that may have changed is time. we are older. though the heart feels young… its different. change! like mehreen, even i have trouble coping with it.

    good read! :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      its not that we are just getting older, Vinay. It is more that we have more responsibilities, more issues to deal with. We have to take our own decisions and struggle for our happiness on our own. It adds to pressure a lot.

  • http://lakeofmydreams.blogspot.com/ Sourish

    wow… that was sweet post…I posted nostalgia and here I see urs…

    actualy wen we grow up we don’t get any forgiveness for any of the mistake we make nor we get the allowances nor we get any time for ourselves coz we get the responsibility of the family…

    I guess these are few of the reason why adulthood is so full of troubles and stress than the childhood days…

    and I do say love ya to every one..coz for me love doesn;t mean that i have to share the bed with person I say I love you…it just shows that u have a special place in my life…

    love ya …

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      you are right, as we grow up there are no excuses for mistakes we make, we are responsible for our decisions and they influence not only our lives but lives of people we care about. That makes things more complicated and less enjoyable.
      Yet, like Mehreen said, we still have this little child inside ourselves :)

  • http://flashfiction.in Aniket Thakkar

    You always find the right nerve to pinch don’t you. :P

    Had been having these thoughts for a few months now. Am finally taking that plunge, the leap of faith as people say. Will be shifting cities next week to finally persue my dreams and do what I WANT to do and not what people excpect me to do. About time, right?

    PS: Nice trick to link from old blog to here. :)
    I’ve been missing out on quite a few friends who still keep track of the old one, but for some reason don’t catch up on the new site. Hard to manage both of ‘em right? :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      i wasn’t searching for the nerves :P
      it is good to finally be able what you always wanted to.. good luck with that :) Am sure you will do your best!

      PS: i only recently thought of linking.. some people somehow hesitate to comment on the site, maybe scared? :D

  • Ankur

    somehow even am bloghoppin today!! :P
    and believe me… the last comment i left was somewhat on the same lines…

    when we look back… we become critical of our doings… the way we did things and the way we could have…

    its like a critic who just plays the spoiler not letting the people just watch and let it go… things cud have been diff… but they arent…
    i wud have been with her but am not… but thats not how it was shaped…

    life has seasons and every season has its own outcome… so just live… :D

    Cheers!!

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      first things first, my place wasnt the first one you commented on? HUH!
      i dont think though its about critic, it is more about changing priorities and finding your place, and learning to appreciate the little joys :)

  • http://dontyouknowitsinsane.blogspot.com Ryan

    “Happiness is an allegory, unhappiness is a story.” – Tolstoy

    Thanks for your blog comment!

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      but we write our stories ourselves, dont we?
      and you are welcome :)

  • http://jrthumbprints.blogspot.com JR

    After reading this piece I couldn’t help but think of the prisoners I deal with on a daily basis. In their world nothing changes; I contribute that to a lack of growth. Nice bit of writing here.

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I have never seen it this way, guess, for some people life will always be the same. And their world won’t ever be different. Though I guess even they had had something different for their lives when they were kids.
      Thanks for visiting :)

  • http://nanyellowtulip.blogspot.com/ yellow tulip

    hey nice post…i guess people forget to take things lightly and become materialistic. Just lose faith in the bond and feelings they share and go behind proving..u know u feel loving r not giving gifts and flowers becomes important. impatience and expectations grow and when we try to fulfill them we jus keep pushing our dreams n old promises to corner..Tats hw we lose ourselves i guess…
    keep penning :)…..Thanks for your blog comment!

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      you pretty much summed up everything i wanted to say. in today’s world priorities are more materialistic and we lose the ability to tell right from wrong. We stop enjoying small joys and pleasures of life. We forget those we love. Thinking we would catch up later.. but we never actually do.

  • http://jaishreesblog.blogspot.com/ Jaishree

    Nice write up Lena…its true what u say, we laugh less, enjoy less, time is just not enough these days.. It is tougher to be happy. We want more from life, we expect more from people. We lose more. it’s something to think about and its very true…when we look back…the childhood days were very happy. As we grow up things change…

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      yup, Jaishree, when we look back, childhood was different… it was simple and now we tend to complicate things.. not many of us are still able to keep this child within our soul :)

  • Farah

    :( ..TOO TRUE… I HATE GROWING UP ..IN FACT I’VE BEEN HAVING QUITE SOME DISAGREEMENT WITH MY MOM OVER GROWING UP ..OH AND BTW ..I STILL WISH OVER EVERY EYELASH AND SHOOTING STAR AND WHATNOT ;)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      you know, even I do the same… and some wishes do come true… maybe because we believe :)

  • http://comedyplus.blogspot.com/ Comedy Plus

    Yes, they do indeed change. It is a shame too for many of the things that change.

    Have a terrific day. :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I guess you are right, it is also our fault that things are change, just we too often realize it too late.

      Have a great day too! :)

  • http://www.indian-wine.blogspot.com Kulpreet Yadav

    Hi Lena!

    Beautifully written! I could relate to almost everthing that you said. Growing up is fun, but once you are there, it just doesn’t seem worth it. It’s good to be child. :))

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      thank you :)
      i believe we still have the power to make things change back.. at least a bit, so that we wouldnt be ashamed of ourselves.

  • Cinderella

    Ah ! This is the one nuance about which the human psyche doesnt stop pondering about.

    No matter how good we are, how happy we are spending our life it is always opening the door to the backyard of your minds and takin a stroll in yesterdays mirth n wist.

    Somehow it was all so much better than now, even if we had less money, even if our desires were so limited, the fact that they are less never crossed our minds,isnt it ?

    Wonderful thoughtful post Le !
    Loved Ankur’s take also at his blog.

    :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      Yup, every now and then we do come back to the issue, dont we? It is in human nature to complain about the present and want to go back in time.
      We wanted less, thats true and somehow i feel we were less tensed and stressed. Growing up sucks indeed..

  • http://intelclub.blogspot.com/ Amity Me

    Hi Lena,

    i say thank you so much for visiting again my site. you’ve hibernated for quite sometime. but thanks you’re back.

    i was so touch with your latest post. i mean, the truth of everything you wrote rings a bell in me. but you know, after we’ve grown up, things still do change, a lot more, maybe on a happier note and maybe on a morbid truth. that we can’t get away with…

    changes…changes…it happens all the time…and most of the time, it’s the heart that’s more affected.

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      :)
      yup, now i am really back and for long.
      as for your thoughts, I agree, change is inevitable and we will always regret things in the past and want those times to come back.. but we got to live with that, I guess.. its not that we are given a choice :)

  • http://www.mypoeticpath.wordpress.com Geraldine

    Oh so true…I’ve been thinking about this topic quite a bit lately. Sometimes I wonder if we do children justice by keeping them so protected from the realities of the “grownup world” for such a long time. I know childhood should be all about fun and discovery but I don’t think that being a bit more open about what’s to come would go amiss either. I think if I had been better prepared for the realities of being an adult, I would have made some better choices and decisions along the way.

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I believe we cant prepare to all the aspects of adult (read: real) life. Maybe we do the right thing to protect children from growing up too fast.. In a way they already do it faster than we did.

  • http://whenhekissesher.wordpress.com A desi

    I took a long walk last night and could only think about how everything is changing. Old chapters are coming to a close and new ones are being written.

    As we grow up things change. Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to be that person’s best friend. Forgive everyone, but only give second chances to a few. :)

    I have learned quite a lot myself in here

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I so wish we didnt have to close old chapters. Guess we don’t really have a choice, do we?

  • http://allabtpj.blogspot.com Priya Joyce

    i dun wanna grow up..any more….:(

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      then dont :P

  • http://myonlyphoto.blogspot.com Anna

    Oh Lena that is why I refuse to grow up. I was like that for about ten years then realized, it isn’t worth wasting this beautiful life, it is just too short. So now I run on fours, and get rag burns on my knees again, lol, of course chasing Matthew. Lena beautiful post, as always. Anna :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I guess when one gets children he/she gets younger else how will you be able to understand their language :D

  • http://rendevious.com Parthasarathy

    Wow.. great post I read in whole world wide web

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      thank you :) glad you liked it!

  • Jessica Hilliker

    This is amazing! I agree with all of it! I’m going through some stuff right now and a lot of things are changing in my life. I’m one who doesn’t like to say good bye or let go of the past. This is so true and I’m glad I got to read it! Thanks :)

    • http://www.thecolorsmagazine.com/ The Colors Magazine

      I am glad it was useful in some sense for you. I know what you mean you dont let go easily.. but sometimes that’s the only way it goes..

      Whatever you are going through, good luck and take care :)