Everyone knows what break-up is. 95 % of people suffered the pain it brings. You know what it is like. You get attacked by grief . You experience a feeling of a great loss. You wish it would be different but you can’t help it. One day you were dreaming of spending the rest of your life with someone you love so deeply. And the next day they are gone. And all that is left to you are memories and questions. And you have a tough time to decide  what is more painful? Memories that keep you being stuck in the past and wondering what if…

Or questions that are troubling you, haunting you and forming lots of insecurities.
Questions that are a real torture.
Questions that make you believe you are not good enough.
And you are seeking for the answers within yourself, within your past, within your life.
But nobody has all the answers, though we all do have our whys.

The heroine of Kate Winslett in “The Holiday” said:

It doesn’t matter how many new haircuts you get, or gyms you join, or how many glasses of chardonnay you drink with your girlfriends… you still go to bed every night going over every detail and wonder what you did wrong or how you could have misunderstood… and how in the hell for that brief moment you could think that you were that happy. And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he’ll see the light and show up at your door.

After the first moments of shock, disbelief, tears, anger the time of HOPE comes. The Hope that they would realize what they have lost and will be back. That’s a false hope – most of them never come back. Some do but things are never the same. And the sooner you realize it’s never going to be back  the way it was the sooner you will move on.

Sometimes the state of pain lasts for months or even years. And then pain can become such a big part of your life that you expect it to be there forever, because you can’t remember a time in your life when you didn’t feel it. But then one day you feel something else, something that feels wrong, something absolutely different, so much unfamiliar. And in that moment you realize you’re happy.

And still quoting Kate Winslett:

And after all that, however long all that may be, you’ll go somewhere new. And you’ll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade…

And then you will be happy again. Because it is okay to let yourself be happy, after all you never know how fleeting that happiness might be.